What kind of homemaker are you? (link up)

When you think of a homemaker what image comes in your head? Mine looks something like this

- A woman who is ALWAYS happy in her home
- Her home is immaculate
- Her kids are well behaved and always willing to help
- She cooks every meal from scratch and serves on a clean and prepared table
- My image, for some reason, the woman is always wearing a dress
- Perfection...this image in my head reeks of perfection

Why? I know I'm not the only one. What is going on in today's world where we think this way? My mom and I were discussing PERFECTION last night on the phone. I have never heard of a man worrying about being perfect. So why do we women do this? What is going on - SERIOUSLY - that we need to be perfect?

I have been struggling with this for awhile and more recently, it's put me in a state of depression. The past few weeks I have hated being a homemaker. I didn't feel like I was worth anything, a nanny and maid could do what I do. I have had this defeated and hopeless attitude. I cleaned a corner of my kitchen counter and made it all pretty. After a couple days it became the place where everyone dumps their stuff. I look at it and have no desire to clean it. My thoughts are "what's the point?...it's just going to get messy again." In fact I feel that way about a lot of things lately. I'm in a funk, but don't worry, I'll get out of it. I seem to go through this a lot in the winter.

But I have realized where a lot of my insecurities are coming from! I always dreamed of being a homemaker...cooking for my family and keeping a tidy home was a big part of it. Well the kids reek havic in my home on a daily basis. I have to decide if I should let them be and LIVE or get on them all the time about keeping things clean (it's mainly toys). My boys, especially my oldest, are extremely picky eaters so eating ONE meal at the table together has gone by the wayside.

But there is more. And although this is a huge blessing to me, it's also a huge downer to my ego...my husband is an EXCELLENT cook. I didn't come from a family that likes to cook and I never cared to learn. Then I got married, then I became a stay at home mom and HAD to cook. Oh and another ego downer is hubby is a clean freak. So me cleaning turned into "let me clean so he doesn't get mad." If he had a bad day at work, I rush around and go crazy cleaning because I know that a clean house has a calming affect on him. And although I want him to always come home and be able to relax, I have 2 kids that are home all day. We only have one car that hubby uses for work so we are literally home all day. I can clean up, and 20 minutes later it looks like I didn't do anything. So when you have a hubby that is picky about how the house looks, well it kinda takes the joy out of cleaning it. Afterall, when you HAVE TO do anything, you no longer want to do it.

But I am working on this. My husband loves to cook and actually enjoys cleaning. On his days off he will get up early and clean the house. This is a huge blessing to a woman. But my insecurities keep getting in the way. "What...did I not do a good enough job?" That's what would go through my mind. I want to have the attitude "you want to clean it? Sure go ahead...that makes my job easier." I'm working on it and praying about it.

I have finally started to calm down about the cooking. One day he called me on his way home from work. He had a really bad STRESSFUL day. I was getting ready to make dinner but I wasn't sure if that's really what I wanted to make. So I told him "Hey - want to play chopped*? So he started cooking dinner and I can't believe what I was witnessing. He was actually relaxing. COOKING relaxes this man. Who am I to stop him? Seriously! I'm going to let my little insecurities take away his source of relaxation. He even has dreams of owning a restaurant so obviously he enjoys this. He never says "wow I worked all day and I have to come home and cook dinner too." NEVER. So now I basically am his assistant. I get the items he needs and I clean up after him. I love cooking and baking but hate the cleaning up part...so I take care of that for him. And it has made an excellent situation. In fact, we are going to play chopped more often. I'll write a post on that after we do it a few times.

*Chopped is a show on Food Network where people compete and get a basket with some items in it and they have to turn it into a meal.

So...what does homemaking look like in your house? Share it with us!

- Who cooks?
- Who cleans?
- How does your average day look?
- What chore do you hate doing the most?
- What do you struggle with the most?
- What do you exceed at?

Make a post about it on your blog and then link up here (Link back here somewhere on your post...I didn't make a button for this so just a simple link)

PLEASE NOTE: THIS LINK UP IS FOR MAKING A POST ON WHAT HOMEMAKING LOOKS LIKE AT YOUR HOUSE BY ANSWERING THE 6 QUESTIONS ABOVE. I WILL START NEXT WEEK HOSTING A WEEKLY LINKY PARTY EVERY THURSDAY. THIS LINK UP IS NOT FOR THAT. ALSO, PLEASE PUT A LINK BACK HERE SOMEWHERE ON YOUR POST. THANKS SO MUCH! 




Linked to:

We Encourage Tues @ Call Me Blessed
Titus 2sdays @ Time Warp Wife
Domestically Divine Tuesday @ Far Above Rubies